- This and more coming up on the Whitney Reynolds show.

When I chose the Naval Academy, I never thought that my femininity would be challenged.

And it was right away I was told that you can't do both.

That you need to, you know, fit this mold and be serious and be masculine.

And I have always been energetic and bubbly and feminine.

- It takes real courage for a student to walk into a classroom, not even have on socks, or have oversized clothes on, or have on shoes that are broken.

And sit and try to focus your attention on a lesson.

Zion's Closet seeks to meet those needs.

You know, - I want to turn childhood bullying into strength.

I want to turn grief into love, and I want to turn invisibility into representation.

- The Whitney Reynolds Show is supported by 10 West Real Estate Group, a real estate investment partner specializing in multi-family, apartment investing, and long-term wealth growth.

Kevin O'Connor Law Firm, when it comes to your injuries, we take it personally.

Respiratory Health Association, healthy lungs, and clean air for all.

Together at Peace Foundation.

Together at Peace creates hopeful spaces for grief and remembrance.

Through Comfort Club founder Christine Marlo shares her personal grief journey and Faith, which has led to Healing Hearts, faith-based program supporting healing in communities.

Joe perillo.com where you can browse a selection of pre-owned vehicles.

Joe Perillo is based in Chicago and ships all over the country.

Children's learning Place, a school for our earliest learners dedicated to aiding every child with the power of learning center for beautiful living, empowering people to live rich, robust, and beautiful lives.

Additional funding provided by the Intrigue, yellow Chicago Lifestyle Foundation and Creative Lab.

BMO High Five Sports Club Chicago Girl, strong empowerment apparel, and XOMD.

- Hello and welcome - To the Whitney Reynolds Show.

Today we're talking about the strength it takes to be brave, that inner strength that we all have.

We're talking everyday brave awakening the soul of our stories.

Come for the stories, save for the heart.

Wear every journey.

You might recognize a new look.

We are ready to take things to the next level.

Whitney's - Here to share your dream.

It's the show I watching the Whitney Reynolds Show.

Be careful Home, - Real lives.

The Whitney Show.

- Welcome to the show.

Thank you, Whitney.

Thank you you so much for having me today.

We're talking every day.

Brave.

And you are one that is serving the United States.

Tell us about your journey.

- Yes, I am a United States Navy Lieutenant Commander.

I've been active duty.

That is amazing.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I've been active duty for 11 and a half years, but I think what makes my story more unique is what I've been able to balance on the side.

- Yes.

- So simultaneously I've competed in Miss USA state competitions five times.

Whoa.

That is incredible.

Thank you.

Launched my podcast.

Why not do both.

And then really discharged this message on my social media for women to balance both, ugh, living a life of dreams and demands.

That's - Love that.

Let's go into that concept.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Balancing both because I feel like the juggle is real, especially as you are serving our country and also like as you said, a beauty queen essentially.

And you're letting people know they can do both.

That's a brave step.

When did you walk into that light?

- Thank you.

I actually never really noticed.

I was always doing that.

So when I looked at, you know, colleges and I chose the Naval Academy, I never thought that my femininity would be challenged.

And it was right away I was told that you can't do both.

That you need to, you know, fit this mold and be serious and be masculine.

And I have always been energetic and bubbly.

And feminine.

Yes.

So I just decided, you know, why not?

Like, why not just be authentic to myself and and lead the way that suits me as long as my intention is good and so thank Will.

- Did you get nervous that maybe it wouldn't be received?

Well, 'cause so often we have, we can put on different masks depending on what room we're in.

- Yeah.

- Did you feel like you needed to change yourself a little bit?

- You know, over the years, every time I'm challenged, I remember being authentic to yourself is never wrong.

And I, I don't think authenticity needs approval.

So as long as I was rooted in my belief in wanting to help others and impact others and lead, what's so wrong with that?

If I'm doing it with makeup on or high heels or I put on a dress on a Friday night, I will put that uniform back on a Monday morning and do both.

That is amazing.

And show that I can lead.

Thank you.

Now one thing I love - Is that you're very firm with who you're, but let's get real.

You probably had a little bit of pushback.

Yes.

Tell us about that and how you overcome.

- Yes, I am definitely that I'm not, that's not a foreign concept to me.

The naysayers.

And when I decided to compete in Miss Ohio USA back in 2016, I just wanted to make friends.

I was in a new duty station, I saw commercial and I was like, why not do Miss America?

That's a good idea.

So yeah.

That's amazing.

I had no idea that the feedback initially would be negative.

My headshot went online and it was posted in some Facebook groups and some members of the military were making fun of me.

And they said, wow, you know, how are you gonna be taken seriously as a naval officer?

You shouldn't do this or pursue this.

This will follow you.

Turns out it was the best thing I ever did.

- I love that.

Yeah.

Did you tell 'em to tune into your podcast?

I have by the way.

You can do both.

Yes.

And you were raised in a military family, so you learned this that you could do it at a young age.

- Yes.

You know, I watched my dad put on a uniform for over 30 years and it was so inspiring.

But I don't remember a time when I saw a woman wear a uniform.

I don't remember that.

And that's why I never saw myself doing that in the future.

But that's why I continue to speak out and have a platform because truly if you see it, people start to believe it.

And I meet young girls all across the country and they've led on to male dominated careers, whether it's in and out of the military.

But because they saw me, they believed that they could do it as well.

And that will always be my intention.

You're so amazing.

Thank you so much, Kelly.

Thank you.

Yay.

Thank you.

- Dr.

Terrance Lester knows what it means to hit rock bottom.

Before founding Love Beyond Walls.

In 2013, his early years were marked by gang violence instability and even homelessness.

Those experiences didn't define him, they refined him.

And outta that pain came purpose to give dignity back to those who feel unseen.

Welcome to the show, - Whitney.

I'm excited.

- Well, when we had your story come into our inbox, it was one that really speaks to today's topic because I would say you are a completely different person than the initial pitch that we saw.

- Yeah.

One of the reasons is because I'm just grateful to be alive.

I remember dropping out of high school gang membership and just really had a tough life headed down the wrong path.

- How old were you then?

- 17 years - Old.

17.

Still a minor out on your own.

- Yeah.

- Contemplated suicide.

- People think that poverty itself is just economics.

Poverty is social.

Mm.

Poverty is spiritual.

Poverty is environmental.

Occupational poverty is psychological.

Physiological poverty is a form of trauma.

- Oh yeah.

- Itself.

We can't separate the two.

And whenever you navigate any form of trauma, sometimes that trauma can impact your emotional state.

I was trying to find my place in my community and my family and nothing really spoke to me, but God, - It was really God that pulled you out.

- I would say God working through people.

Mr.

Moore, who was my friend's father, he was a leader in the community, a pastor.

And I remember one day telling him, telling me that you're gonna be a leader one day.

He's the same person that told me that he thought I could put myself through school, that I could overcome my circumstances.

Because people don't become what you want them to become.

They become what you encouraged them to become.

- Community became his turning point.

Mentors fanned the flame and the former dropout earned a doctorate and now writes and teaches from the very road he survived.

What did it take for you to believe in yourself?

- People allowed me to borrow their courage and confidence in me long before I had it.

For instance, if you come from an environment where everything in your environment says that you're not gonna make it, you can't overcome.

What if you are playing these narratives over and over in your mind it creates imposter syndrome.

But yet a Mr.

Moore can come into to your, your life and say, I see potential in you, even when you don't feel that within yourself.

One of the programs I'm most excited about is an initiative that we started called Zion's Closet.

Imagine a title one school elementary school where students will come to school and their families may be unhoused, maybe they woke up in a shelter or a motel, or even a family that may be living in the car.

It takes real courage for a student to walk into a classroom, not even have on socks Or have oversized clothes on, or have on shoes that are broken and sit and try to focus your attention on a lesson.

Zion's Closet seeks to meet those needs.

We work with principals in elementary schools.

They give us a classroom, we go into the classroom and we retrofit it.

What if the family doesn't have access to a washing machine?

Washing machines and dryers in there, healthy foods, refrigeration is in there.

Parents have an opportunity to go into this space without the shame and the stigma of saying, I don't feel adequate enough to walk into my child's school to be proximate to work with them.

After we opened the closet, we cut the ribbon.

A teacher walks this student into the closet, the shoes had broken, despondent, crying in tears, couldn't engage with the lesson, walked 'em right over to a pair of brand new shoes.

And we saw the joy return because you have to feel confident about yourself stable in yourself as a student to feel like I can connect with the lesson without having to focus on what it is that I'm struggling through.

- Zion's Closet is expanding across schools through local partners, making basics accessible so kids can learn.

For the kids watching that might be in a difficult situation like you were, what would you say to them about getting out and getting out safely?

- I would say my story shouldn't be rare and it shouldn't be so difficult for you that faith is anchor.

It's something that can help you build the resilience.

I would say there is a community out there waiting to support you.

I would say your dreams matter.

You know, allow yourself to dream.

- I love it.

Well thank you so much for coming on.

- Thank you.

Yeah, - Welcome to the show, Joe.

Oh, Whitney, I'm so excited to be here and so excited to see all of you.

Thank you so much for having me here.

- He's an author, educator, and mentor who's helping others find their truth from growing up in a small town in Illinois to becoming an award-winning L-G-B-T-Q Writer and Professor Joe AKAs uses his voice to remind others that who you are is not something you hide yet.

It's something to celebrate.

They love seeing you as well because you've really stepped into who you are.

But what I want to do is walk back to where you found your voice.

- Absolutely.

I, my story is definitely one of transformation.

You know, I want to turn childhood bullying into strength.

I want to turn grief into love and I want to turn invisibility into representation.

All of those layers influence how I write and how I teach and how I show up for queer youth all over the place.

I think some of my defining moments, you know, number one, I had a childhood where sadly I think my father didn't like me.

And I know it's really hard to say until he did.

Until - He did.

Okay, well amen.

Let's hear it for that.

- But the sad thing is he liked me when I brought girls home.

So like as a teenager, I, I hid who I was and who I wanted to be.

I always knew who I was and I never really understood, like as a, when I was a little kid, why my father might not like me.

You know?

- Did you know at a young age that you identified as gay?

- Absolutely.

I just didn't always have the way to articulate that.

Like, I knew that there was something different and I knew that what people were wanting me to be or the projection that was pushed onto me or the, the funny jokes my dad made when he did like me, it was all a version of someone else.

- When did you find your boldness to step into who you are?

- So I've been teaching, you know, over a quarter of a century now, both high school and college courses.

For the last 15 years I've been a full-time professor.

And when I jumped ship from a very small conservative high school to college, I just knew this was a moment.

I had to be who I am.

And so for example, I had students bring up, not even mean comments, but odd comments like, oh, thank goodness, you know, I remember a mom telling me once that she discovered something very sensitive on her son's phone.

Okay, I'll just say it that way.

But she made this comment in class that thank goodness my son's straight.

And that was something that kind of just punched me in the stomach a little bit and was like, wait a minute.

You don't have to have that reaction.

I think whoever we are can be celebrated.

And even those moments are ways of trying, I think, to hold back who someone really is.

- Did that trigger you back to the childhood bullying?

- Absolutely.

It was like living with my father all over again and he wasn't a terrible person.

That's not what I want to say at all.

But I do think it's very hard to live a childhood through a different version of who you are meant to be.

So it took me right back to that because any kid in that room, who is L-G-B-T-Q, who heard them a mom make a comment like that, that hurts them too.

Mm.

So I realized my voice has to matter for all the L-G-B-T-Q kids that are in my class.

I'm not trying to make anyone uncomfortable, you know?

Right.

But I am trying to inspire and save lives and I think that's why those stories and coming out, why it matters so much.

- So, and let's go to the idea of saving lives through owning your story.

What do you mean by that?

- Well, for me, you know, turning to our stories, it allows us to do a couple of things.

Number one, I don't think storytelling is an indulgence or just entertainment for many people in the queer community, it's actually survival.

It is how we learn to see ourselves.

You know, we have to escape sometimes into lgbtq plus stories to see the life that we could have.

And I hope that inspires someone to see, like, one of my favorite things to do is just to write about queer friendships.

Joyful, beautiful, wonderful young adult friendships.

When people love you for who you are, not for who they want you to be.

That's how we save lives, you know?

And that's just one of the things that I like to talk about in the classroom and in my books - And your literature.

What do you want your readers to take away?

- I want readers to feel seen on the page.

It's as simple as that.

When I was growing up and was suffering silently on the inside, I escaped through books and through movies and through music.

But I'm a child of the eighties and the nineties.

And as much as I love that stuff, I never saw me on the page.

Or if it was, it's a side character or it's like something in a scary movie where you get killed in the first act or something.

Right.

I want to be a hero.

I want queer individuals and queer characters to see themselves not as someone on the side, but as the center.

Someone who can win the fight, whatever that is, who takes home the top prize.

And that's why I write, I want every single letter in lgbtqia plus to be represented.

You know, I don't see our lives as problems to be solved.

I see our lives as songs to be sung.

- Wow.

Well you sure are inspiring and leading the way.

Thank you so much for coming on, - Whitney.

Thank you for sharing stories like this.

This is why I'm here.

'cause you inspire me.

- When I first went to prison, I thought my life was over.

It was just beginning.

I can't be here.

Why don't we go to the movies?

One of them I'll never forget.

And now we welcome this Spider - Woman, bill Condo, and Nu welcome to the show.

You two.

Yeah.

Okay.

Nu I want to know, because your character was so strong throughout, it was this leading queer character.

I wanna know how you stepped into that.

Was there any of your personal experiences that led you to lead this so seriously?

- Absolutely.

No, a hundred percent.

I mean, if you look at it, it, it, it's not just an opportunity for centering a Latin character as a lead, but it's also looking at a person who is gender queer.

Right.

And, and there's a certain level of responsibility when it comes to representing that I have an entire career of holding those truths.

But with Molina specifically, I was wonder, I kept asking myself, how do I enter this conversation into a larger, into the country?

And how can we center Molina and decentralize their, like their identity is there, but I don't want that to be the topic.

I want you to fall in love with their humanity, because at the end of the day, their form is so far less interesting than the person living behind that.

- And Bill, how did you manage to keep the fantasy and reality with this film and understand what to cut and what to keep in from the original play?

- It, it, it's true.

It, it was always a question.

And there's frankly one number I shot that I thought didn't work for that reason.

You know, it, it came deep into the movie at a very, very dark and emotional moment.

And it was meant to be Molina taking that moment and imagining it in the film.

And it was like, no, we're past that.

You know, I think these two characters have, you care too much about each other.

Now he cares too much about Valentine to suddenly be putting him in that movie.

So you, you learn those things when you put it together.

But mostly thank God, the rest of it, the rest of it I thought made, made sense.

When, when it was all edited, - Tiani, what personal aspects of your life did you lean into for your role?

- I mean, I, I always joke around that when people ask me, what, why did you become an actor?

I would say that my acting is a trauma response.

You know, you learn to code switch quickly in life in order to survive.

And I think that there's a certain level that Molina does that to an extent.

They lean on their comedy in order to, to protect themselves because physically they may not be able to.

But what this gi, what this film really afforded me was a reminder that the totality of my expression is my superpower.

To be able to oscillate from masculinity to femininity and everything in between is what makes life beautiful.

And so if I was able to do that in one night, like two, like two hour film, what can people at home do when they, whenever they want.

Right?

That's the beauty of being alive.

- Thank you both so much for coming on.

You have a fan in - One in seven people has kidney disease and they don't know it.

- After routine blood work, Manesh received a call from his doctor.

Within moments he learned his kidneys were failing.

The diagnosis was shocking.

And across the nation a similar story.

- My kidney function was not ideal back in my thirties, but we didn't understand why.

We discovered that my kidney function was really, really low and that was referred to a, a transplant team.

I was in shock.

What they said is, you hit the cliff and then goes from being so sold to like really bad, suddenly within a few months.

And then we gonna start the process of trying to find you a living organ donor with the help of your friends and family members.

- We wrote to our friends and family and six people volunteered to gimme a kidney.

I was so lucky.

- My living donor came from, came from far away from the middle of Michigan.

She's my hero.

Stephanie saved my life, - Both share more than a diagnosis.

They received lifesaving organ donations and support from the National Kidney Foundation.

We caught up with the DC chapter at Tower Club Tysons, where thousands of dollars was raised to support their work.

We've - Recently started the Innovation Fund the past couple years ago, and we're really investing in startup companies and people who are doing really interesting things for kidney disease.

There are changes.

They, you know, lifestyle changes, dietary changes, medicine, things that they can do to prevent the progression to kidney failure.

- This fund is an impact investment program created by the National Kidney Foundation to accelerate the development of new therapies, technologies and treatment that improve the lives of people affected by kidney disease.

Today's stories remind us that bravery isn't always loud.

It's sometimes in those quiet moments with our ourself that tell us keep going.

Remember, your story matters.

- The Whitney Reynolds Show is supported by 10 West Real Estate Group, a real estate investment partner specializing in multi-family, apartment investing and long-term wealth growth.

Kevin O'Connor Law Firm, when it comes to your injuries, we take it personally.

Respiratory Health Association, healthy and clean air for all.

Together at Peace Foundation, together at Peace creates hopeful spaces for grief and remembrance.

Through Comfort Club founder Christine Marlo shares her personal grief Journey and Faith, which has led to Healing Hearts, faith-based program, supporting healing in communities.

Joe perillo.com where you can browse a selection of pre-owned vehicles.

Joe Perillo is based in Chicago and ships all over the country.

Children's learning place, a school for our earliest learners dedicated to aiding every child with the power of learning center for beautiful living, empowering people to live rich, robust, and beautiful lives.

Additional funding provided by the intrigue Yellow Chicago Lifestyle Foundation in Creative Lab, BMO High Five Sports Club Chicago Girl, strong empowerment Apparel, and XOMD.

- The inspiration keeps coming all season.

Here's what's coming up.

- The last time I toured the Vatican, I met a, a padre there, a priest.

The most extraordinary thing he did was take us behind the Sistine Chapel.

There's a little room back there, I didn't know this.

And he said, it's called The Room of Tears.

And inside that room is a small papal vest.

And whenever the guy is elected, the new guy is elected, he gets up, walks into that room, and they say, at that moment is when they always cry.

- Amazing.

- And I, I've been grateful to him ever since.

It was an extraordinary thing.

And he said to me one day, he said, you know, I've got this fella Pierre, this French guy, blah, blah, blah, who's doing a, a musical about St.

Bernadette.

The young woman who plays St.

Bernadette is remarkable.

And I just thought, this is a performance that people should see.

- You said there's this truth, there's this truth that runs through that people need to know.

What is that?

- It's about witnessing, I guess, the witness of, of the strength of God, of strength of, you know, this, this, this relationship we have with the Creator and it's Justin Reynolds - And the fire of Retaken delayed.

This is a story that I guess a lot of people know, but my brother played before me and he was also number 36.

And so that's a big motivation of mine to kind of take his number to where it hasn't been yet.

So, you know, the highest level possible.

- Want to stay connected to all things.

Whitney Reynolds will follow us on social media and you'll get exclusive content and updates from the show.

All episodes are available for streaming anytime.

Hi.